If there’s one thing that has always been a trial for me, it’s keeping my relationship with God on track. I tend to go through phases of extreme hunger for God then I’ll get to a place where I couldn’t care less if I include Him in my life.
My bipolar desire for God get’s on my nerves. Yet I am completely aware that I’m the one who controls my intake. His presence is there. He is there waiting and longing for me to take time and notice Him. He’s waiting for me to stop my pouting about how I don’t feel Him and start noticing how He’s right there. He doesn’t care how much of an idiot I’ve been. He just wants me.
Realizing that God desires us as a lover desires that one particular other is a crazy thought. He’s a God of desire and passion. All of it directed towards us, the unfaithful whores who just drop Him at a whim and chase after the next trill.
Another thing that is insane to grasp is that God’s love doesn’t die. It doesn’t fade away. It’s not like the fickle marriages that we see. Our love may fade, but God’s doesn’t.
That is unfathomable.
Picture how intense it would be if we were like that towards God.
Unfortunately, we are human. Therefore we have the tendancy to get completely distracted or loose our appetite completely.
I was contemplating this whole keeping an appetite for God and wanting Him even when we’re not “hungry” thought. In reality when we’re not hungry, we don’t refuse to not eat ever. Food’s our lifesource. Not eating will eventually cause you to die.
What do you do?
We take in smaller portions even though we don’t feel like we want it, because we know that doing so is what is best for us.
Round up point: Even when we don’t feel God or are even hungry for God…nibble!
Sit and listen. Read. Scream. Shout. Dance. Sing.
Find the best way for you to nibble on God’s presence so your appetite for Him increases.
Eventually, you’re bound to be ready to dive in full heartedly. Sometimes it just takes a while for our stomachs to grow . . .